Rain
by The Hamartia of it All
Summary: "I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN STOP HIM! JUST GET OUT OF HERE!" And without another word, he ran off, leaving Starfire alone in the cold October rain. The Tamaranean princess could tell that she was crying, but she felt her salty tears becoming diluted by the raindrops that slid down her face. How could he say and do those things to her…? Starfire's thoughts during Haunted. RobStar.


_A/N:_

_I've recently become a huge fan of Gabrielle Aplin and I was listening to November, which then inspired this little oneshot. Haunted is one of my favourite episodes because it's just so emotional and deep and you can really see how Robin really depends on his friends to stay sane. That episode is pretty much how I picture Robin if the team ever fell apart or if he ever left — as you may have seen in my other stories._

_I know, I know, I should be writing my Season Six story, but I'm stuck on it! I know what I'm going to do next, I just can't get it to sound right. So in order to get around this little writer's block, I've decided to exercise my skills as a writer with smaller stories. As soon as I get over my writer's block, I'll update Season Six! I would just like to thank you all for your patience, your reviews are very much appreciated!_

_Enough of that, here you go!_

_Set during Haunted. Starfire's perspective._

_Disclaimer: Don't own the Teen Titans. That would be a dream come true, wouldn't it? Most italics are direct quotes from the episode_

* * *

_Rain_

_"Uh, I hate to interrupt your little nature hike, but WHERE WERE YOU?!"_

The sniffling changeling ripped at his hair as he glared at the Titans leader, already coming down with a cold from battling in the rain. The rest of the team stood and floated beside him, not minding the rain as much as he was at the moment. Raven's soul-self provided her shelter, and Cyborg and Starfire seemed unaffected by the cold and wet weather. Robin paid no mind to his tone as Beast Boy continued, _"We had to finish off Cinderblock by ourselves, in the rain, and… and — AHHHH-CHOO!"_ Against his will, Beast Boy morphed into an elephant as he sneezed loudly and painfully. _"Great. Now I've got a cold."_

With her hands clasped together and pressed to her chest, Starfire watched Robin with concern. He'd been acting strange lately, and spent long hours staring at the crime scanner, even on peaceful days when there was hardly any crime. Oh, how it worried her greatly to see him isolate himself and become absorbed in his work, and she suspected that there was only one thing on his mind. Her suspicions were confirmed when Robin

_"Slade."_

That name again. The very mention of that name struck Starfire with both fear and anger, especially when it was uttered by Robin. The way he would grit his teeth as he hissed his archenemy's name, crease his forehead, and tense up his body was enough to make Starfire afraid of her best friend.

_"He's back."_

The other Titans were less certain, especially Cyborg, who had mentioned to Starfire earlier that he'd caught Robin rummaging through the basement for Slade's mask. Something was wrong, very very wrong, and Starfire was sure it had less to do with Slade than perceived.

_"You sure it was him? I mean, you've kinda had Slade on the brain lately. Maybe —"_

Robin stepped towards Cyborg and swung his arm out, silencing him instantly. _"It was him. He's going to create a massive earthquake and we have three hours to stop it."_

But Cyborg remained unconvinced. "I_ don't get it. The dude fell into a _pit of lava. _Who lives through something like that?"_

_"Apparently, Slade," _Raven droned, also unconvinced.

_"Yeah, he's pretty… pretty — AHHHH-CHOO! AHHHH-CHOO! AHHHH-CHOOOO!"_ With each sneeze, Beast Boy morphed into different animals. _"…slippery."_

It seemed Robin wasn't listening to any of his friends, and Starfire could only watch him worriedly. She couldn't find the right words to say, and knowing Robin, he wouldn't rest until Slade was stopped. _"We'll worry about how he survived later. Right now, all that matters is how we stop him. Cyborg, check out the bridge. Raven, take the park. Beast Boy, the pier. Starfire, we're going after Slade." _Thunder and lightning struck, illuminating the fierce expression on their leader's face, and the Titans had no choice but to obey.

The Titans went their separate ways, and Starfire followed Robin into the forest, where he claimed to have fought Slade himself. She believed her friend had seen Slade, but she hated the way he was behaving. It only made him seem more like his archenemy, something she'd pointed out to him after his Red X plan had gone awry.

Rain poured heavily onto the pair as they walked in silence, but this didn't do anything to slow down the Titans leader. In fact, it was Starfire who was having some difficulty keeping up, and she found that she couldn't fly because of her own confusion. How could Slade have survived falling into the volcano? Even Tamaraneans couldn't survive that intense heat, and she was certain that Slade was a human. Then again, the criminal mastermind was full of tricks. Perhaps it wasn't even the real Slade who fell into the volcano. After all, only his mask was recovered.

There was a chance that Robin was right, and since he'd trusted her enough to help him take down Slade, she took the matter seriously. When it came to Slade, Robin believed that if he wanted something done right, he had to do it himself. Bringing Starfire along was a sure sign that he trusted her as much as she trusted him. Heck, she even believed in him when he didn't believe in himself, but right now, she didn't know what to think. Every instinct in her body informed her that something was very wrong with Robin. All these conflicting thoughts in her mind confused her greatly, and she feared she wouldn't be as much use to Robin once they finally located Slade.

_"Fear not, Robin, we will stop him,"_ she said reassuringly, breaking the silence. She had to show him that she was still there for him, even if she couldn't use her powers at the moment.

But Robin didn't even look at her as he trudged on. _"We have no other choice."_ His T-Communicator rang, and he pulled it out of his utility belt, flipping it open impatiently.

_"Robin,"_ Cyborg said through the communicator, _"I'm at the bridge."_

_"Did you find the seismic generator?"_

_"Man, I can't find diddly! No signs of anything unusual." _Robin growled angrily and shut his communicator.

Minutes later, Raven called and informed Robin that she hadn't found anything at the park either. Beast Boy, too, called and reported that he hadn't found anything at the pier (while sneezing violently). However, Robin remained adamant, urging each of the Titans to continue their search for Slade's seismic generators.

Robin threw his communicator to the ground in frustration and continued walking, much to Starfire's shock. The T-Communicator was a symbol of their team, their bond, and he cherished it greatly. That is, when he was himself. _"I told them exactly where to find the generators. I should have gone to find them myself."_

Nonetheless, she was determined to comfort him and keep him as calm as possible. X'hal knows what he'd do if he didn't calm down. Starfire stopped to pick up his communicator, cradling it in the palm of her hand as if to protect it from harm. _"They will be found, Robin. You must have faith in your —"_

Lightning struck, and Robin froze in his tracks, before running off farther into the forest. That obviously wasn't a good sign. _"Robin?"_

There was no way she was going to let her best friend hurt himself.

"Robin!" she called out as she darted through the forest, the rain splashing into her eyes and the mud causing her to slip occasionally. "Please, where are you?!" How she wished she could use her powers to fly and find him faster. With each step, the bad feeling in her heart spread through her veins and made her stomachs uneasy.

In the distance, she could hear explosions, Robin's muffled yells and grunts of pain, and she willed herself to run even faster, until she came to a clearing. There, the Titans leader was alone and on his knees in pain, staring up at something with anger.

_"Robin!"_

_"Starfire, stop him!"_ he commanded, pointing to the empty space between them. Who was she supposed to stop? If her vision was impaired, Starfire couldn't tell if it was because of the darkness or the rain. She received her answer when lightning flashed and provided some light as she looked around in confusion. What was he so upset about?

She had no time to react when Robin ran to her side, his nostrils flaring and his breathing heavy with rage. Her bad feeling intensified, then became replaced with pain. Real, severe, physical pain, that spread throughout her body.

_"What happened?!"_

Starfire couldn't believe it. She even blinked to clear her eyes as she looked down at her left arm, currently being tightly gripped by her enraged best friend._ "You are… hurting me!"_ Still, he didn't let go, and only strengthened his grip on her as he leaned closer and raised his voice.

_"SLADE RAN RIGHT BY YOU! HOW COULD YOU LET HIM GET AWAY?!"_

There it was again. That name. Robin had seen Slade… but… Starfire had not, no matter how hard she tried. She only became even more puzzled, and her turbulent emotions flooded her head and caused her eyes to fill with tears. Her best friend had done something she never thought he would do.

Robin was hurting her. And she was terrified, not of Slade or his alleged plot, but of the one person she trusted most.

Still, there had to be a way to get through to him. Surely he was ill or sleep-deprived? How else would he be seeing things that weren't there? Starfire took a breath and blinked back her tears, suddenly thankful that it was raining. _"But, Robin… There was no one there."_

"No…" Robin recoiled in horror, dropping her arm immediately. "That can't be… I saw him! I know what I saw! Are you calling me crazy?!"

She shook her head firmly, gingerly holding the arm that he'd grabbed. Five green bruises were already forming, all in the shape of fingers and a thumb. "No, Robin. I do not think you are deranged. But perhaps you have become infected with the cold from the rain? Or perhaps you are tired, Cyborg has informed me that you have not been getting enough sleep —"

"How can anyone sleep when that _madman_ is at large?!" he shouted, turning away from her.

"Robin —"

"I don't need you. I'll find him myself."

Those first four words broke Starfire's heart to pieces, but she still found herself putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder to stop him. "Robin, please —"

"LEAVE ME ALONE STARFIRE!" he screamed, whirling around to face her and his hand about to strike her. Starfire shrunk back in fear, shielding her bruised arm from him. This caused him to falter a little, as he lowered his clenched fist, but he remained furious. "I DON'T NEED YOU! YOU'RE USELESS! I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN STOP HIM! JUST GET OUT OF HERE!" And without another word, he ran off, leaving Starfire alone in the cold October rain.

The Tamaranean princess could tell that she was crying, but she felt her salty tears becoming diluted by the raindrops that slid down her face. _How could he say and do those things to her…?_

All her life, Starfire was never one to give up on her loved ones. Fierce loyalty in friendship was something that was taught to Tamaraneans from a young age to ensure unity on the warrior planet, and she expressed that teaching every day with the team. She especially held that belief with Robin, the leader of the team, her first true friend on Earth, and the subject of her romantic feelings. It was her way of repaying him for the kindness he'd shown to her on the fateful day that the team had met, and maybe even hinting at her feelings for him, not that he ever noticed.

But what was she to do? Even on Tamaran, it was never easy to forgive. Warriors held grudges in order to channel that rage into battle, but her time on Earth had softened her ability to harbour bad feelings for too long. Still, she didn't know how to forgive Robin for the things he did. Those words he said hurt her deeply. What's more, he'd _physically_ hurt her. Bruises may heal, but the memory of how they formed and stained her skin would stay with her forever. With his current behaviour, however, Starfire wasn't even sure that he would _ask_ for forgiveness.

Wait… Robin was still her best friend, that would never change. She knew him better than anyone else, including himself. He would always apologize, even if he wasn't directly at fault. He hated making mistakes and took them all to heart. This behaviour that he'd exhibited… this stubborn, merciless vigilante was not who he was.

Something was very wrong with Robin. And she had to get help.

Since she was utterly useless in her confused condition, she had to think hard about things that made her happy in order for her to fly. But with her mind in turmoil, it was hard to think, and she closed her eyes and felt the rain on her skin.

_That's it. The rain._

There was something magical about the rain. While it was a natural part of a living planet's cycles, Starfire hadn't seen anything like it in a long time. Since the Gordanian War laid her planet to waste, it hadn't rained on Tamaran in years, so Starfire greatly appreciated the rainy weather on Earth. It reminded her of the days of old, when her family was whole and the planet was still proud and peaceful.

Starfire had always loved flying in the rain on Tamaran. She and her siblings would use flying in the rain as an excuse not to take a bath, claiming that the rain had washed them all clean. And on Earth, she found that she could always think clearly when she was either watching or flying in the rain, as if it cleared her mind. Whatever the reason, she generally enjoyed rain. She took a deep breath and thought of her happy memories of rain. When she opened her eyes, to her relief, she found herself floating five inches off the ground.

Now to get help for Robin.

When Starfire finally found her friends using the rendez-vous coordinates that Cyborg had transmitted, she explained to them what had happened between her and Robin, emphasizing her growing suspicion that Slade was not directly involved in this situation.

_"I have never seen Robin so angry… so angry at me."_

Cyborg stepped closer to her, his hand stretching out to her shoulder._ "Let's go find Robin." _Her friends eyed her newly formed bruises warily, but followed Cyborg's lead as they located Robin's communicator.

_Of course_. He was in Slade's old hideout. She should have known and gone straight to him. It was unbearable to think about whether or not he had hurt himself even more.

Part of her hoped that leaving him in the October rain had, in its own way, diluted his strange behaviour and brought some sense into him.

In the tunnel to the hideout, Cyborg followed the locator signal and informed the team that Robin was nearby. His location was confirmed by the echoing of Robin's screams and the sounds of something being thrown against metal from the main chamber, causing Starfire's heart to slam against her chest. Oh no… was she too late?

At lightspeed, Starfire took off in the direction of Robin's screams, and the mere sight of what she found as she entered the chamber shocked her so much that she had to land. _"Robin!"_

Behind her, Cyborg shone his shoulder light into the room and directly onto their distressed leader, who seemed to be fighting an invisible opponent… and losing terribly.

Sniffling, Beast Boy blinked. _"Um, since when is Robin into mime?"_

_"SLADE!"_

Making a mental note to ask her shapeshifting friend what "mime" was later, Starfire instinctively rose her hand and lit up a starbolt, suspending it in the air to light the room and chase away the shadows that Cyborg's light could not. There was no one else in the room.

Angrily, Robin spun around and faced his team. _"What are you doing here?! You're supposed to be finding the generators!"_

Cyborg's gaze softened with sympathy, in contrast to the tensing up of the rest of his body. He seemed to still be under the impression that Robin was merely being paranoid and delusional. _"I don't there are any generators, man. We looked everywhere."_

The bruised and battered Titans leader remained unconvinced. _"Slade must be cloaking them, just like he's cloaking himself! That's why you couldn't see him!"_ That last theory was directed at Starfire, who quickly thought back to how he'd hurt her and yelled at her in the forest.

Raising an eyebrow questioningly, she replied with the obvious question, _"But if I could not see him, why could you?"_ None of this was making any sense. If only they could convince him to return home to the Tower and get examined, or at least treated for his newly inflicted wounds.

Her statement once again seemed to spark something within Robin — hopefully reason — but that expression quickly became replaced by an accusatory scowl. _"What are you trying to say?"_

Raven was the first to respond, floating between the team and their distressed leader. _"Robin, are you sure you really saw Slade?"_ Finally, someone else could see what Starfire could see in Robin. He was most definitely not himself. Maybe Raven could get to him, Starfire thought. She had a way of reasoning with people, especially Robin. Hopefully he would listen to her. As the seconds passed, Starfire grew more anxious and desperate.

Instead, her question provoked his anger. _"Saw him?! I_ fought_ him!"_ He pointed to his ripped sleeve and bluish bruises. _"You think I did this to myself?"_

His answer was clearly shown on the faces of his friends. It was Beast Boy's turn to try. _"Dude, this is the only way out, and we were standing here the whole time. No one got past us."_

_"No one was in here but us," _Cyborg added.

_"I don't have time for this,"_ Robin said resentfully, making his way to the exit. _"I have to find those generators —"_

His path became blocked by the large form of Cyborg. It seemed he was done with trying to reason with the Titans leader, and resorted to blunt honesty. _"There_ are_ no generators. There_ is_ no Slade!"_

_"I KNOW WHAT I SAW!" _Robin yelled, stepping back as he took out a bird-a-rang. _"I have to stop him! I'm the only one who can! And I'll take down _anyone_ who gets in my way!"_ He held his weapon offensively, preparing to throw it at his team.

Time froze. _He was going to hurt them. _He was _actually_ going to hurt them. The Titans could see it plainly on his face. Beast Boy reeled and stared at his leader in absolute horror, scared for his life. Raven was appalled, and she didn't even try to hide the fear on her face. The two of them couldn't possibly fight against Robin and win; they were much too concerned with hurting him in the past, when he became Slade's apprentice. And Cyborg, too, was horrified by the threat that was just issued against them. His eyes expressed both concern and the realization that there was truly something wrong with Robin.

All of Starfire's instincts urged her to do whatever was necessary for the greater good of the team. Robin was a danger to himself and their friends, and she had to stop him. Enough was enough.

Then Starfire did the unthinkable.

Robin's scream of pain and subsequent fall to the ground was over before the rest of the Titans realized what had happened. The alien heroine stood behind their fallen leader, her eyes and hand charged with starbolts. Naturally, she decreased the strength of her bolts so that it would merely stun him.

Her heart broke even more when she saw the betrayed expression on her best friend's face as he went unconscious. She was always on Robin's side in the past, and she was the one person that he could count on for total support. But then again, that was when he was himself, when she still believed in him.

His behaviour was not natural. Even when he was Red X and Slade's apprentice, he would never hurt them.

It was finally clear to the rest of the Titans that Robin was sick and needed help. Still, as she carried his unconscious body back to the Tower, Starfire couldn't help but feel shame.

* * *

_"It's okay, Starfire. It's okay…"_

Those words echoed in Starfire's mind as she made her way to the kitchen. Those weren't the exact words she wanted to hear from him, reassuring as they were to her. Was that his way of apologizing to her? Robin had collapsed into Starfire's arms before any more words could be exchanged, and though she wished he'd say more, she flew him back to the Sick Bay without delay.

Cyborg had finally deduced that Robin's vivid hallucinations were caused by the dust he'd accidentally inhaled while holding Slade's mask and would have been fatal if he continued fighting, but what concerned her most was the fact that the chemical was triggered by someone outside the Tower. That meant that there was a possibility that their long-time enemy was still at large.

But that was impossible, right? Terra had _literally_ thrown him into the fire. Even Tamaraneans couldn't survive that, so how could Slade?

She sighed as she rummaged through the freezer, the October storm still raging outside the window. After Raven healed most of Robin's wounds and sent him to his room with almost all of the first-aid ice packs, Beast Boy had taken the very last ice pack in the infirmary and brought it with him to bed. With him sickly and contagious, there was no way she was getting a hold of it any time soon. Frozen vegetables were her only option if she wanted to heal her bruises faster.

"Star?" a voice piped up from the couch.

Frozen peas in hand, the alien heroine whirled around to find Robin peeking up at her as he lay on the couch in a _karategi_ covered in ice packs. "Robin? What are you doing out here? I am certain that Raven ordered you to go to bed."

Sliding the ice packs off of him, Robin gingerly got up from the couch and let out an embarrassed chuckle as he limped towards her. "I… I didn't want to sleep in my room. It doesn't feel safe to me tonight."

"But Robin, your living quarters are the most secure in the entire Tower," Starfire replied. "Why must you sleep out here, with the lightning and thunder visible in your line of view? Would it not disturb your sleep?"

"Actually, the lightning kind of provides a night-light of sorts… I hate to admit it, but total darkness is the last thing I wanna have right now." He leaned against the counter in front of her and noticed the bag of peas. "Midnight snack?"

Starfire blushed. The Titans were all too familiar with her occasional habit of snacking on strange items in the middle of the night. "I uh… There were no more packs of ice left in the infirmary after Raven gave them all to you and Beast Boy, so she suggested that I use a bag of the frozen vegetables."

His masked eyes widened in surprise. "For what? Oh…" He lowered his gaze to the five green bruises, and an expression of shame crept onto his features. Not taking his eyes off of them, he stepped towards Starfire, who stood still and cautiously. He took her hand in his as he lifted her arm and examined the finger shaped bruises. "I did this…"

"It is all right, Robin. It hurts me no longer. My people are most resilient. It shall heal in no time. And you were not in your usual state of mind, so it is not your fault."

Robin shook his head firmly. "No, Star. It _is_ my fault. I'm to blame for everything that happened tonight. I hurt you and I endangered our friends. I'm responsible, Star. And I don't think the others will ever forgive me for threatening them. I don't imagine _you'd_ forgive me, either."_  
_

"'Ask and you shall receive.' That is an old Earth proverb, is it not?" she said softly, her hand squeezing his. She relished the feeling of his warm, ungloved hand and the hint of the smile on his face. "We are your friends, Robin. We will always stand behind you, and we will always forgive you, but only if you ask."

Finally, he smiled and lifted her hand to place it on his badge, where his heart thudded from underneath, not once letting go. "I'm so sorry, Starfire. For scaring you, for yelling at you, for hurting you… for everything. Can you ever forgive me?"

Already she could feel her heart soaring with joy, and though he took no notice, the bright green bruises on her arm were fading, even without the frozen peas. "I already have," she replied. "You are my best friend, Robin. I will always forgive you." Starfire suddenly noticed just how close they were standing, with their foreheads only inches apart, and she stepped back bashfully, letting go of his hand. "Now, I shall bring you to your bedroom, where you shall rest and heal yourself, and then you may ask our friends for forgiveness in the morning!"

It was Robin's turn to blush, and he rubbed the back of his neck. "Actually I…" He cleared his throat. "I don't know if it's too much to ask of you…"

"What is it, friend Robin? If there is anything that you need, I would be most happy to assist."

Still blushing, he couldn't meet her eyes, and for a moment Starfire feared that she had done something wrong. "Um…" he choked out, voice strained. "I really don't want to sleep alone tonight… Honestly, I'm still a little scared. Not of Slade or anything… I think that this experience has shown me that _I'm_ my worst enemy. I mean, I guess I've always known that, but tonight's proved that not letting go of my fight with Slade is going to be my downfall if I don't stop and that scares me and I'm babbling." Why was her friend at such a loss for words? she wondered, giggling softly. Robin raked his hands through his unspiked, messy hair and sighed. "I'm still scared, Star. Would you mind… Would it be okay if I slept in your room? You don't have to say yes, if you want to get some sleep tonight too, I mean you're probably tired to. You're under no obligation, it's just that I've always felt safer with you around and I really need to feel safe if I want to get some sleep tonight, but you don't have to —"

He was finally silenced by Starfire's gentle finger on his lips. "Of course, Robin. I would be most happy to assist you. There is no need to be embarrassed. On my planet, the sharing of a bed is a normal instance between close friends and family. Is it not the same here?"

Robin chuckled. "Ah… sometimes. But it's kinda weird, since we're teenagers and —" He stopped himself when he saw the puzzled look on her face. "Never mind. Let's go to bed."

The two didn't even notice that they were holding hands on the way to Starfire's bedroom, which itself was right next door to Robin's. At her insistence, she cocooned him in her blanket and had him face the window, before she slipped beside him and held him close. Keeping a close eye on the window — for the rest of the night she decided to stay away in order to keep watch over him — Starfire began to rub his back as gentle as possible, and to her delight, she heard him sigh peacefully. As the October rain outside of her window diluted and washed away the stains of that day, Starfire could Robin's tension and pain melting away while he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

_Author's Notes:_

_1) I highly recommend listening to "November" by Gabrielle Aplin. It is a beautiful song, and its lyrics are what inspired Starfire's thoughts here. I don't like writing songfics (I'm not very good at them), but I did paraphrase some of the lines used. (Also don't own the rights to that song)_

_2) I feel like I'm overanalysing things, but while watching Haunted for the millionth time, I noticed that Starfire wasn't using her powers at all while they were searching in the forest for Slade. And her eyes expressed nothing but confusion and concern for her best friend as she _walked _closely behind him. I know she doesn't reveal the connection between her emotions and powers to him personally until Stranded, but I found it interesting. In fact, she only seemed to use her powers in the episode out of desperation, strengthening them each time Robin endangered himself._

_3) There are a lot of RobStar oneshots about what happened after the credits rolled in Haunted, so I incorporated the idea that Starfire and Robin slept (as in slumbered) together, but with my own tiny twist. Also, I always wondered what happened during the commercials after Starfire told Robin that she didn't see anyone run past her. This is what I came up with, and I'm sorry if Robin seems really harsh, but remember that he's under the influence of the dust._

_Anyway, thanks for reading! I'm so sorry that I haven't updated Season Six! Really, I've tried, but I'm at a creative block for composing it. So until I finally get over it, you might see more oneshots and drabbles from me in the future._

_[shameless self-promotion time!] I find it easier to communicate on tumblr, so if you guys have one and want to reach out to me (like if you have any ideas, story requests, etc.), you can send me a message on my blog. It's i-never-quite-grew-up-so-i (there's a link on my profile), and if you decide to follow me, I'll follow back, because my dashboard has been dead lately and I need more blogs to follow!_

_Thanks so much for your support! Please review (and, out of habit I will add, no flames!)_

_Maribel ∞_


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